And then, nobody came.
I was ready to teach a vinyasa class. A nice warming flow because of the cold snowy day outside. Music on, some nice beats to get into the right state of mind. It was time to start the class, but where were my students? I realized that they would’t come today. Because of the snow, work, emotions that got in the way or the couch that was to soft to walk away from. Very understandable reasons.
And then my ego started to talk to me. ‘Are you a good enough teacher? Maybe they don’t enjoy you’re lessons as much as they say they do’. And for one second, I believed my ego. I felled like I was failing. What I forgot was that this was only the third lessons I gave at that spot. Every time when I teach the students are guaranteed. At an office or school where the students already signed up. This place I created myself. Because I wanted to teach more and there where a few people interested, I contacted a community centre to teach there and I had to tell the people myself that yoga was taking place. So maybe, I should give it some time before I’m judging myself? Like we always say in yoga, there is a beginning, a middle and an end to everything. I’m at the beginning of a new path. And I had to remind myself that you always have to be a beginner before you can ben anything else. Besides, doesn’t everything happens for a reason?
After that moment of doubt I realized that this was a great lesson. Not only in trying to stay humble but also to always make the best out of every situation instead of feeling bad that things did not work out the way you would like them to be. So what could I do? I started my selfpractice, then and there. I had a mirror which I normally never use. So this time I could watch myself in postures and modify wherever it was needed. I became my own teacher and it felt really good! I decided to make a picture to capture this moment of pureness where my students weren’t there and I did yoga anyway to make myself stronger. Nobody came, but I became a little bit closer in trusting myself.